Open letters to Human Resources people after rejections

Thank you for your letter.

I am interested in pursuing further positions at your organization. I would appreciate your help in determining how I can best fulfill the organization's needs. You wrote that you have other candidates for this position that "more closely fit the experience and skills requirements," yet I don't know how to fit this position any closer. It is 100 percent what I have been doing for many years. If there is a match that is greater than 100 percent, I would like to know, as I know many scientists and mathematicians that would love to write a paper about this previously unknown quantity.

If you have time, I would very much like to know how to best convey how my experience and skills can match more than 100 percent the job listing. Any help is appreciated. Thank you!

Cheers!


Letter 2
Dear person who interviewed me,

I appreciate the opportunity to come and interview at your office for the transcript coordinator position. As someone who has been to 4 universities as a student and worked at six universities in various office and faculty capacities over the past 13 years, I was rather confused by your message that you went with someone with more academic experience.

As you described the position, the transcript coordinator looks at transcripts from other colleges, makes a unappealable decision based on whatever mood she may happen to be in that day, and makes decisions on whether one computer science class is close enough to another in scope and quality despite having no expertise in that field. It sounds like a pretty great gig - ultimate power with no accountability! Kudos to you for nabbing it yourself!

Again, you went with someone with more experience. While comparing this statement to the actual job description, it seems to me like getting rejected from a fast food job for lack of experience.

BTW: I know that lies are all a part of the process, but please don't say you have some more candidates to interview Monday, but then call on Saturday to break the news.

Toodles!